Is It Really "Sex" or Is It Not?

The following article is from the desk of Hardie Logan, one of the brothers at the Madisonville church of Christ.

Ever since Eve partook of the ‘forbidden tree’ in the Garden of Eden, man has tried to work around things that God meant and justify his sin. When God asked Adam, “Who told you that you were naked?”, Genesis 3:11, Adam immediately tried to justify himself replying, “The woman You gave to be with me, she gave me of the tree, and I ate.” Later, in Genesis 4:8-9, when Cain killed his brother and God asked Cain, “Where is Abel your brother?”, Cain tried to justify himself by asking, “…am I my brother’s keeper?”

All through the Old Testament, and even in the New Testament, we see examples of people trying to work around answering God and justifying sins they commit. And that has not changed, even to this very day.

Take the issue of what is called ‘cybersex’ or ‘phone sex’. Many people participate in such things, and if truth be known, many of those people think that if they do it online, and no one knows, then what’s the hurt? Two people communicating together, doing their own thing. They would even argue that it is no one else’s business. And there is little doubt that it must be billions of dollars business. Sex sells no matter how you band-aid it.

But it’s still immoral. Cybersex and phone sex cannot in any way be labeled as being righteous or noble or right or pure or lovely or admirable or excellent or praiseworthy in the eyes of man or God. No matter how you spin it, cybersex and phone sex are nothing short of “virtual adultery.” As James would say, “You ask and do not receive, because you ask amiss, that you may spend it on your pleasures. Adulterers and adulteresses! Do you not know that friendship with the world is enmity with God? Whoever therefore wants to be a friend of the world makes himself an enemy of God”- James 4:3-4.

But some people would argue, “It’s not real sex, so it isn’t sex.” But it actually is called ‘cybersex’ and ‘phone sex’ right? It is an act of luring another person into an ungodly affair. And when people do it, what are they fantasying about? Surely, they are not fantasying about Godly things, but about their own desires and lusts. A person that is immoral in their mind and with their desires will eventually become immoral in their actions. As Proverbs 23:7 says, “For as a he thinks in his heart, so is he…”

Jesus taught it in Matthew 5:27, “You shall not commit adultery…” and while there was no such thing as “cybersex” or “phone sex” back then, I would put forth that both terms are included as they are “virtual adultery” or “cyber adultery”.

Among Christians this should never be. Let us be a people that strive after righteousness, godliness and purity.